2026見證

  Kieran Stephen Paul Bastien Sharing見證

I grew up in an extremely atheist and agnostic family. My grandmother was partially tormented in her failed uprising as a catholic nun and my father believed that the Bible was no more than a group of men hallucinating on drugs. My parents did not raise me Christianity, and no one in my family was religious. After my first year of public elementary school, my parents put me and my sister into a Catholic private school as they wanted us to receive a more disciplined education and environment. I attended this school for 4 years, taking religious classes, attending Friday mass, however even with that exposure I still struggled to confirm if the God I was being taught about was true, and if the Bible was even a reliable source of information.
Coming out of elementary school I entered into a public middle school and lost my connection to Christianity as a whole. That was until I met a girl in my junior year of high school who was a Christian. This person forced me to rethink the Bible and dive deep into my understanding of a God and sin. I felt intimidated by the sheer amount of information I was behind on. I had forgotten almost everything that I had learned in Catholic school. It was fun to relearn and reread the chapters, but I came across a struggle as I read. A lot of what I had been taught, and understood as basic laws of the universe were challenged. If I was being honest, in the beginning, I was just reading the stories, not internalizing them and having faith in them. It took me a while to not just read to comprehend but read to believe in something more powerfully. I struggled a lot to grasp the concept of a perfect being creating an imperfect system to which it followed suit in. I struggled to understand the idea of physics breaking miracles. There are many things that I still question even though it seems like many other Christians are much more secure in believing.
I am still learning if it is okay to believe in some parts of the Bible and not others. I still struggle as my ideologies and baked in understandings clash with faith, but the bottom line is that I believe that Jesus existed and that He is the son of God, and that through Him I will go to heaven. I want to openly profess that faith, follow in his teachings, and get baptized to create a relationship with God and understand more about Christianity and my own beliefs so that, one day, I might be able to treat the people around me better, treat myself better, and develop a deeper appreciation for my relationship with the world around me.

我在一個極度無神論和不可知論的家庭中成長。我的祖母在她成為天主教修女的起義失敗後曾飽受部分折磨，而我的父親則認為聖經不過是一群吸食藥物後產生幻覺的男人所寫下的東西。我的父母沒有以基督信仰來養育我，而在家人中也沒有任何人是宗教信徒。在我讀完公立小學一年級後，父母把我和妹妹送進一間天主教私立學校，因為他們希望我們能接受更有紀律的教育與環境。我在那間學校就讀了四年，上宗教課程、參加星期五的彌撒。然而，即使有這些接觸，我仍然難以確定我所被教導的那位上帝是否真實存在，以及聖經是否真的是一個可靠的資訊來源。
從小學畢業後，我進入了一間公立初中學校，並逐漸失去了與基督信仰的連結。直到高中的三年級，我遇到了一位基督徒女孩。這人讓我重新思考聖經，並迫使我深入探討自己對上帝與罪惡的理解。我被自己落後的龐大資訊量而感到不安。我幾乎忘記了在天主教學校所學到的一切。重新學習及重新閱讀那些章節是有趣的，但在閱讀過程中我也遇到了一些困難。許多我曾被教導、並視為宇宙基本法則的觀念都受到了挑戰。老實說，一開始我只是把那些故事當成故事來讀，而不是去內化它們並對它們有信心。我花了一段時間才從「讀懂」轉變成「讀進心裡」，並開始相信某些更深刻的東西。我很難理解一個完美的存在為何會創造一個不完美的系統，並讓它照著不完美的方式運作。我也難以理解奇蹟如何能打破物理定律。即使到現在，其他基督徒在信仰上都比我更堅定，但我仍然對很多事情有所質疑。
我仍在學習，是否可以只相信聖經中的某些部分，而不接受其他部分。我仍然在掙扎，因為我的思想與根深蒂固的理解常常與信仰產生衝突。但最重要的是，我相信耶穌確實存在，祂是上帝的兒子，並且通過祂我將能夠進入天堂。我想公開宣示這份信仰，遵循祂的教導，並接受洗禮，以建立與上帝的關係，並更深入了解基督信仰與我自己的信念。希望有一天，我也許能更善待身邊的人，更好地對待自己，並對我與這個世界的關係有更深的體會與珍惜。